Missed It
by smartkid37
Summary: The dust has begun to settle and the lines drawn. One agent realizes that although they made their decision as a team; a show of solidarity for Gibbs and for each other; he has no chance of going back because somehow, for all his intelligence and experience after years on the job, he screwed up. He's the one that….


**Episode Tag: **_"Damned if You Do" - Season 10 Finale_

* * *

**Date:** _Sunday, June 2, 2013 _  
**Time**: _2145 Hours_  
**Location**: _Outside Tim McGee's Apartment, Silver Springs, MD_

"C'mon, McGee! I know you're in there! Open up!" Tony demands through the door that stubbornly remains unopened, despite this being the tenth time he's knocked on it while calling out for his friend and teammate. "C'mon man, let's talk about this! Gibbs' is expecting us at his place tomorrow and he's not gonna like this; you refusing' to talk to us, ya know!"

The ringing of his cell phone in Tony's shirt pocket, forestalls any further knocking he has in mind as he stops to see who's calling him at this hour, especially since it only rings twice before it goes silent. He's been here at for almost thirty minutes now and since it's so late, he can't think of who would be calling him now. With a glance at his phone, he scoffs light. _, as if he didn't really expect this_.

Of course she would be calling. She's been worried sick about Tim since the young man stopped talking to her; to all of them, almost since the day they'd turned in their badges together a little over two weeks ago. "Alright, McGee, all bets for privacy are off since our Mistress of the Dark is worried enough about you to call me to check on you at damned near eleven at night now." Tony warns as he begins to pick the lock on Tim's door. Before he's done, the door is opened up from inside, revealing a very disheveled and pale Tim McGee.

"Hey, Probie. Thought you'd never come to your senses and let me in."

"Just let you in so my neighbors can sleep, DiNozzo." Tim answers grumpily. Pointing to the couch, he walks away, talking over his shoulder. "Lock up. You can crash on the couch. I'm going back to bed."

"Oh, no, you don't Probie-wan-kenobie! I came here to talk to you and talk is what we're gonna do! You've had two weeks to figure this out from a different angle, man. I've given you all the time I can to give me a better answer. It's time to admit you're dead wrong about this."

"Not tonight, Tony. I have a headache." Tim announces quietly as he steps inside his bedroom and closes the door between them.

Tony can't help but frown. _Well, damn! Abby's gonna kill me!_

*****NCIS******

_**Date:** Monday, June 3, 2013  
**Time: **_0745 _Hours  
**Location**: Leroy Gibbs' Driveway, Washington, D.C.  
_

"Good morning, Ziva." Tony offers his Israeli-born teammate as she gets out of her car and joins him where he's standing at the hood of his own, breakfast laid out enough for all that are expected to arrive shortly.

With a soft smile, she accepts the coffee he's holding out, long past suspecting him of pulling a prank every time he's doing something nice for her. "Thank you, Tony. Looking around, she notices Tim has not yet arrived. "You are here early . That is unusual. Where is McGee? I thought we were all meeting here this morning? "

"That was the plan. At least what was requested by Gibbs. I have no clue why McUnusually tardy isn't here yet. He's been really down all this time about what happened, but that doesn't add up to him not being here. The boss hasn't told me to come in yet either. I'm not disturbing' the man this early so I guess we're gonna have to wait a few more minutes and see what happens."

"I agree. It would not be wise to enter his home this early unless he opens the door to us." Ziva added as she raised her cup to her lips and sipped her coffee.

*****NCIS*****

Tim McGee lies awake, unmoving as the morning breaks over the world outside, complete with blinding sunlight streaming through the cracks in his window blinds as it seems only to bring into sharper focus for him, the depth and width of his screw-up that cost them so much in things that can't even be measured. Things like trust, dependability and unshakable faith that they are the good guys doing what's right and at the end of the day, they've done the best they could. Even worse is the damage done to the belief that no matter what, as the bonded members of the MCRT they always did their best to have each other's backs, no matter who was after them.

Looking over at his bedside table, his eyes find the team photo, taken not even two months ago, where everyone is happy and obviously feeling comfortable with each other, secure in the knowledge that they were a tight-knit family who would always be there for each other, through thick and thin. Abby had even gotten Gibbs to include himself, citing the reminder that he is, for all intents and purposes, the head of the family as well as the Team Leader. She'd gotten a soft smile out of him at that and he'd silently stood tall and proud between Tim and Tony with Abby and Ziva each striking a pose as one of the young men's girlfriends, for the kick of it. Even now, the memory brings a smile to Tim's face.

The smile quickly slips away as his thoughts quickly return to the same questions that lately he's been asking himself is it, then, that all he's felt for the past two weeks is the weight of a guilty felon who's gotten a 'get out of jail free' card once too often? For some reason, he just hasn't been able to wrap his head around the fact that he'd missed it, every bit of it.

The full scope of what _it _was, nearly takes his breath away every time he thinks on it for longer than a few minutes; the right information, the clues that Bodner was playing with them and that Tim had fallen into the trap the guilty man had set for them, the most important clue they were after about that pain in the ass investigating agent had somehow completely escaped him. Not only that, but he'd been right on the edge of getting it right and had rushed through his thought process at that time and gotten it completely wrong.

Tim should have realized what was really happening when he'd hit on the realization that the surreptitious digging that had been done into cases the team had worked ran earlier than Ziva's assignment to the team. He should have realized right then and there that this also meant the investigation wasn't aimed at Vance either, since the man's appointment as Director had been several years after Ziva's arrival.

Even more maddening and damaging to his own self-assessment is that this truth had been right there in his grasp; the truth that Gibbs was the target of the investigation the entire time. The simple truth of the matter is that not only had he missed that all-important clue, but also the investigation had damn near been successful in ruining Gibbs because of it. Because he'd missed it,they'd had literally no advance warning of it all coming down on their Team Leader's head.

To make matters worse, in fact half of the problems Gibbs faced from the investigative nightmare,were because not nearly enough case information had been secured through the years, as it should have been. All the hacking he had done over the years should have been more thoroughly encrypted if any record was kept at all. Anything and everything that could have been done _should_ have been done and he's smart enough and experienced enough at doing it to have made sure it got done. The bottom line is Tim had screwed up.

It's cost the agency big-time, created public relations nightmares with Homeland Security among other agencies, led the team to have to resort to drastic measures to save the situation and now all their futures are up in the air as a result, well so much as Vance will let them be. He knows the team is confident that the Director won't let the bus they've thrown themselves under, debilitate them for long, if at all. But Tim also knows that there's no way he deserves to ask for _his_ badge back.

With that refreshed conviction once again taking up all the space in his thought process, Tim heaves a heavy sigh and throws the covers off, forcing himself to get up out of bed. He'd be damned if he was going to stay at home, waiting for the calls and the knocking to start, as one by one, his former teammates realize he's not coming back. His absence from this Team Meeting at the boss's house will surely spell that out for them and none of them will settle for that without a fight; a fight in which he's not willing to engage.

*****NCIS******

Leroy Jethro Gibbs lets out a deep sigh as he closes his phone and puts it back in his pocket. It's been a damned difficult two weeks. The investigation nearly ruined him and did its best to invalidate all the years of work he's spent putting away the bad guys and giving justice and closure to the victims left behind. Worse in his mind, is that it had done nearly the same amount of damage to his team. The phone call he has just received is testament to that.

_"Need you to know something since you're meeting with your team this morning."_

"Something going on I don't know about, Leon?"

"_You could say that."_

"I'm listening."

"_I wouldn't be expecting McGee to show up, if I were you."_

"Why the hell not?"

"_He's not coming back."_

*****NCIS******

"Hey, you guys! Welcome back!" Abby exclaims with joy as she gets out of her car and rushes over to Tony and Ziva, her arms thrown wide enough to encompass both of them in her hug.

"Oof! Need to breathe, Abbs" Tony huffs out with difficulty until Abby releases him from her Abby-style hug.

"Don't you dare complain, Tony!I haven't seen you for ages!"

"I know. We missed you these last two weeks, too." Tony replies sympathetically.

"I know. Hey, speaking of 'we', where's McGee?" Abby asks with a touch of surprise. "Why isn't he here with you?"

"That's what we were hoping you could tell us."

"You don't know?"

The lift in her tone warns them that an "Abby" style alarm is imminent and as they brace for it, only the sound of Ducky's Morgan saves them as it fills the air when the M.E. pulls into the driveway, wasting no time getting out of his car even as Abby nearly races to his side.

"Ducky!"

"Ouch, my dear! No need to shout!" Ducky admonishes her gently. "What seems to be the trouble so early on this fine Monday morning?"

"Timmy's not here! That's the trouble!"

"Ah, I see." Ducky replies with a somewhat odd note in his tone.

"Duck man! You know something! What is it?"

"What it is, my dear, is not anything I am at liberty to share with you."

******NCIS****  
**

"That's not happening, Leon'!" Gibbs is quick to lay down his law on the subject. "I'm not losing any of my team to this crap!"

"_Gibbs, I tried talking some sense into him, It didn't do any good, He says everything that went down could have been avoided if he hadn't screwed up; gotten the clues wrong, fell for Bodner's trap, left Ziva alone knowing she had exactly what she needed to go find Bodner without backup. Thinks he doesn't deserve the badge"._

"He also stayed through the night on a hunch that he was being played. _He'_s the one that caught it, Leon. And he damned sure didn't try to deny it when he discovered it!"

"_I know that, Gibbs. We all know that. Apparently, that doesn't hold enough weight against the rest of his 'screw-ups; at least, not for him. I've got a strong suspicion that it has just as much, if not more to do with the fact that what he deems as his screw-up almost cost you your career."_

"Damn it!"

"_I agree. That's why I signed his reinstatement papers just as I did for the rest of your team."_

"There a 'but' in there?

"_He doesn't know it yet so don't expect to see him at this meeting you're having."_

"There a reason you're just now telling me this, Leon?"

"_Thought you'd appreciate the chance to recuperate and regroup after the fiasco we've all just been through, Gibbs."_

"Should have told me sooner, Leon."

"_I apologize."_

"Make sure McGee stays reachable to you, at least until I can talk to him."

"_Already planning on it, Agent Gibbs."_Leon's tone leaves no doubt he is getting irritated at Gibbs' old bossy demeanor already coming out. _"I also got him to commit to not accepting any other job offer while we sort this out. God knows, if word gets out that he doesn't work for us anymore, the whole damned alphabet soup will be nipping at his heels, begging to sign him up."_

"Appreciate it, Leon." Gibbs offers as his boss ends the call. Snapping his phone shut, he picks up his pot of freshly brewed coffee and forces himself to steady his hand while he pours himself another cup; this one to go.

As he heads back to his front door, his thoughts turn back to the conversation he's just had with the Director about McGee. He can't help but frown. The team can't afford to lose any one; especially now. They've made it through the hell and brimstone, so to speak; together. Now is _not_ the time to fall on their swords! He knows it's easier said than done and especially for Tim, letting this go, since the key pieces that fell apart were in his lap. But he'll be damned if he'll let _any_ of his agents let what happened screw with their confidence in their place on the team, HIS team!

Speaking of … he can hear his favorite already, her anxious voice carrying across the distance and even through his front door before he gets it open. Surprisingly, even Ducky's voice is loud in the exchange he can hear quite clearly now. He finds himself standing still to listen, his hand frozen on his door handle.

"Ducky! This is Timmy we're talking about! My friend? The guy who never tells anyone when he really needs a friend or a shoulder or a father or…"

"Abigail, calm yourself!" Ducky orders. "I am well aware of Timothy's penchant for stubbornly remaining silent no matter the personal struggle he is enduring."

"You know something about what's going on with him, don't you? I haven't seen him or heard from him since that terrible day they all turned in their badges, Ducky! It's been the worst two weeks of my life! I mean worse than when they were split up when Vance first got here!"

"Yes, Abigail, I'm afraid I do know and quite well at that. Unfortunately, that does not alter the remaining fact that I cannot break a confidence. Nor do I wish to."

"Oh, alright." She caves with an overdramatic flare of petulance.

The opening of Gibbs' front door stops their lively exchange instantly and Gibbs is quick to speak into the sudden silence that has descended in his driveway.

"DiNozzo, you trying to wake up the whole neighborhood?

Glancing at him, Tony can't help but notice the man is obviously not happy; his mouth is now hiding behind the coffee mug currently being raised for a drink but the stiffness of his shoulders adds credence to the observation that something is definitely going on. "Mornin' Boss." Tony greets almost hesitantly before digging for some information." I'm guessing McGee's running late?

"Go on in. I'd better find my place still standin' when I get back." The Team Leader orders without answering his Senior Field Agent's question as he keeps walking to his car. "Mornin' Duck."

"Good morning, Jethro. Is everything alright? You do remember you requested that we meet with you this morning?"

"Yeah. I'll be back in a few. Hold down the fort for me, will ya, Duck? Coffee's already brewed. Help yourselves."

"Certainly Jethro. I'm assuming wherever you're going is extremely important and cannot wait?"

"Yeah." Gibbs replies on a pained sigh as he gets into his car without another word.

The four of them watch in stunned silence as the Silver haired man backs out of his driveway and is quickly gone from sight in his souped-up sports car that _still _leaves Tony drooling with envy, some four years since the boss brought it back from Stillwater.

*****NCIS****  
****  
**

As Tony and Ziva enter Gibbs' house, they exchange glances of concern. Gibbs is obviously in a hurry to go somewhere. Does this mean he's chasing down McGee? As if reading each other's minds and that silently expressed hope, they both silently take a seat at the kitchen table as if too troubled to do anything more at the moment.

Ziva offers a small smile of thanks as she accepts the coffee Ducky is soon setting in front of her; she glances over at Tony and is surprised to see a look of shock on the young man's face. "Tony?"

"Hmm?" Tony is distracted and doesn't look her way as he vaguely answers her.

"What is it?"

"It?"

"Whatever it is that is bothering you?" Ziva explains herself further.

"Bothering me?"

"Something is obv…"

"McGee?" Tony finally looks over at her as he interrupts her to voice what he's thinking.

"You are, as I am, hoping that Gibbs is going to find him and bring him back to us, yes?"

"Somethin' like that." Tony admits almost absently, his eyes soon unfocused once more as he loses himself to his thoughts.

******NCIS******

Slinging his overnight bag over his shoulder, Tim turns on a lamp in his living room, makes his way to the table by the door to pocket his phone and identification and then scoops up his keys. In minutes, he's lockedup his apartment and descended the stairs to the cemented path that leads tothe parking lot. He's glad that it's been a couple of hours without anything to disrupt his peace of mind, but with every step he takes towards his car, his heart grows heavier. Guilt, culpability and regret are like dead weights he cannot seem to unlock from his shoulders and he finds himself unable to see anything around him beyond the steps he needs to take to reach his car.

As he reaches his car, only his experiences gained through serving years under Gibbs lends Tim the ability to quickly realize he's no longer alone. Raising his eyes up off the ground, shock brings his feet to a standstill and takes from him, the ability to speak beyond the first word that comes to his mind. "Boss?"

"Going somewhere, McGee?"

******NCIS******

He's knee deep in movie trivia backlash between Ziva and Abby as they side against his never-ending stockpile of knowledge, so he doesn't know what makes him look over at the boss's backyard gate. They're gathered on Gibbs' back deck and Tony is relieved when he lays eyes on his mentor, not even an hour after he'd left.

"Boss! You weren't gone long. Did ya get what you were after?"

Coming through the gate into the backyard and nodding in silent greeting in Ziva's direction, Gibbs quips "I never leave a man behind, DiNozzo."

"I know, Boss, but I don't know where Mc…MCGEE! THERE you are!" Tony nearly shouts as Tim, following in Gibbs' wake, is finally noticed. "For a while there, I was sure you were gonna hold on to that stupid idea of yours an…" Tony drops his sentence as he feels the heat of the boss's glare from across the yard.

The boss silently acknowledges Ducky's entrance from the house and watches Abby practically run to McGee and embrace him with her normal exuberance. Seeing Tim return the embrace with a soft smile on his face, brings a wave of relief to him that _almost _has him smiling as he heads into the house, more than ready for another cup of coffee. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Ziva greet Tim calmly albeit with a friendly kiss on the cheek that the young man shyly accepts. With a quiet huff of amusement, Gibbs realizes some things will never change and he, for one, is glad of it.

He knows that precious little communication was shared between him and his nearly MIA agent during their ride back to the house just now, but he also knows that it's one of those things that will probably never change between him and his boy genius; that inability to strike up a conversation between them. Strangely enough, for once the Team Leader finds reason to pause at this realization; wishing things were better and hoping he can figure out a way to change things between them before this kind of thing happens again.

******NCIS*******

As he settles back down in his lawn chair, Tony notices Tim's less than happy demeanor. Okay, so the probie's not here solely on his own volition. So then what the hell's going on? Before he can think about it any further, Abby and Ducky disrupt his thoughts by disappearing into the house in the boss's wake.

With the trio gone from the backyard, at least temporarily and Ziva also disappearing into the house, Tony's first instinct is to dig a little into what's going on with his Probie. It doesn't matter that the younger man's been on the team for almost ten years now. He'll always be Tony's Probie, little brother and friend. "Hey, Probie. Talk to me, man. What made you change your mind since none of the rest of us managed to do it?"

Tim glances up at Tony, his eyes clouding with the memory of just what had persuaded him to return.

_***Flashback***_

"_Going somewhere, McGee?"_

"_Boss, I… Vance already called you, didn't he?"_

"_Ya think?"_

_Standing his ground, Tim looks directly at his former boss directly. "Then you know why I can't go back to work for NCIS."_

_**Thwack**_

"_Ow! Boss?"_

_The only response he gets is the silent look that tells him he's not thinking straight again. The one that tells him to rethink things and quick. What's worse is the fact that now the boss is folding his arms across his chest and leaning back against his car, actually waiting for Tim to give in!_

Tim's goose is cooked and he knows it. There's no fighting Gibbs when he's like this and truth be told, Tim's finally beginning to feel the weight of all that guilt lift from his shoulders. After all, if the boss still wants him on their team, he can't have screwed up nearly as badly as he'd convinced himself he had, right?

_With a deep-seated sigh, Tim lets go of the stubbornness that has kept him going on this road. He's no match for Gibbs and he's actually happy to be able to let go of the struggle, at least enough to let things work themselves out. Who knows, maybe with Gibbs to help him navigate his way through this mess, he'll be able to figure out where to go from here. Obviously, the boss is telling him that even though he missed it; the right information they'd needed before it was too late, he still belonged on the team. Who was he to argue with that? Quietly, he gives up the fight. "Okay."_

_With a short nod, Gibbs is pleased enough with the outcome to head back to his car, yet determined enough not to let Tim out of his sight, that he glares at his agent for even thinking of not getting in the boss's car. Gibbs silently rolls his eyes at the younger man as Tim finally gets it and climbs into the Team Leader's car._

***End Flashback***

"Hello? Earth to McGee!" Tony's strident voice breaks through Tim's thoughts.

Shaking his head enough to shed the memory, Tim stands to his feet and heads out around Tony just to stretch his legs before heading inside, needing to make sure there isn't something he can be doing to help out.

"Hey, you gonna talk to me?"

"Tony, I appreciate all that you and the others tried to do, everything you said. Really. It's just that… ***sigh*** "

"You had to hear it from Gibbs before you could believe it." Tony surmises quietly as it finally clicks into place for him.

Tim stops moving as he looks at his teammate with all seriousness. "Exactly."

"You two boneheads, get in here! Food's getting' cold!" Gibbs hollers from inside the house

Tim and Tony grin at each other. _Oh, yeah. The team is definitely back together!_

***FINIS***

* * *

_Special Thanks to my BETA Gottahavemyncis!_


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